Off-Topic Forum

Where do strippers keep all their money?

The pole vault.

Why are there no cupcake shops in Canada?

They hate icing.

What did Lou Costello say when asked if he knew who sang "Pop Goes The Weasel"?

I don't know... 3rd Bass!

Howabout,

The Cleavland Barons, another is the Atlanta Flames, and finally the gut buster, The Memphis Mad Dawgs. LOL

Confuscious say, "How can man walk with four balls?"

Yeah, heres one:

I read the other day that MLB was considering starting the 2020 season at MLB stadiums without any fans in the seats. I guess that means business as usual for the Reds and Tampa Bay Rays.

LMAO

Two old men are talking one day, and one of them asks the other "I wonder if there is baseball in heaven?"  The other replies "I don't know.

The next week the old man that was asked the question passed away.  A few days later the old man still living was woken up hearing a voice.  That voice told him "this is your longtime friend and I have good news and bad news".  The good news is there is baseball in heaven, the bad news is your pitching next Wednesday."

Why does Iowa not have a professional football team? Because Minnesota would want one too!

Two lady doctors were playing golf one day. They teed-off on the 7th hole, which was a par 3, with a blind green, on the other side of a rise in the fairway. The 2nd doctor drills her shot, which is a worm burner (low line drive) that just clears the rise in the fairway. Suddenly the doctor hears a blood curddling scream from up by the green. They go racing over the hill, to find one golfer curled up in the fetal position on the ground, with both hands cupped in his groin. The other 3 from the foursome, were standing around trying to figure out what just happened. When the lady doctor arrived she told the injured golfer, she was a doctor and to relax. She proceeded to put her hand down his pants, and massage his testicles for a few minutes. When she finished, she asked the injured golfer how that felt. He told her fantastic, but his thumb was still killing him.

A yeshiva decides to start a crew team. But no matter how much they practice, they lose every single race. Eventually they decide to send one boy down to the nearby prep school as a spy, to watch their winning crew team and find out what their secret is. After a day of reconnaissance, the boy comes back. “Listen!” he tells his teammates. “I learned how they do it — they have eight guys rowing, and only one guy screaming!”